Tuesday, 27 November 2012

Back in 1993

I'm pretty sure I broached this subject back on my wordpress before, but if you had not read it back then, I'm here to talk about it again.

Back when I was just a few months old, my daddy gotten into this huge ass accident. It was on this desserted/ulu street where apparently, many others had gotten into accidents at the same spot before.
It was such that, most people who has had accidents at that  exact same spot, died because they were in a japanese made car. Luckily though for daddy, he was driving the citroen then, and it was more sturdy. But still, he broke his leg, and went into coma.

All along, i never knew about the coma thing, although I did know for a fact that he was hospitalised for over a month, and has nails stuck in his legs because apparently, the bone grew over it such that it could not be taken out anymore.

So for some awkward reason, I honestly don't even know how the topic gotten around to this even, while mummy and her cousin was chatting (on sunday) over the baby's full month celebratory high tea at Marriot, I learnt that daddy was actually in a coma back then.

Not sure why, but at that moment, I felt such a huge rush of guilt over me, because if daddy actually took time to sleep at night after getting back from work instead of taking care of me while letting mummy sleep, this accident might not have happened. Maybe because they did jokingly say it as such before, that's why it hit me harder, but that was exactly how I felt right then.

Even if I knew that the place/tree he had the accident at is a common accident spot, of which people even mentioned that it's because there are dirty things occupying that area. I just can't help but to feel that some of it, was partially my fault.

Mummy says that daddy believes he's living on borrowed time now, because he had visions and flashbacks of sorts then, like he was given a chance to live again, or to move on, and he chosed to continue living.

I wouldn't know what I'd be like now if he had decided to choose the latter option back then. Would mummy have had remarried? Would I have any of my younger siblings? Would I still be living as comfortably as I am right now?

But because of all these, I am even more determined to do better this semester, and even better in future. I will make sure I return to daddy what he has given to me double, triple and more!


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